Hahahaha omg I'm ridiculous. I remember telling everyone I'm completely over you but honestly, I don't think I am. You were even my boyfriend but I miss more than I've ever missed anyone. This is the most difficult post-"relationship breakup" ever and I'm sad to say that, it's over and I have to get used to it. No matter how much I'm struggling, I have to accept it and move on.
I've tried everything. From dating other guys, to even trying to hate you. I've consoled in my closest girlfriends whom you know and they tell me to move on. Even from one of my girlfriends, this is what she noted, "I think its cus its the first guy that treated you like a princess & you weren't used to that. But you needa realize that all guys should treat you like that. So just meet another guy that treats you that well...whose also tall tan & sexy." Hahaha I love her words of wisdom, and it's true.
I was recollecting all the memories from before. How good he was to me and how I wasn't too fond of how well he treated me because it wasn't something that I've dealt it. Whenever he had complimented me, I'd always say something to backfire instead of accepting it and thanking him. It hit me that I missed him the most when I had a drink with my gf's sunday night. We all got totally wasted and the next morning I woke up with the fattest hangover. As soon as I woke up, I thought of him. Because the last time I was at their place, hungover the next day, I called him and he came to pick me up & he took care of me. All I was longing for what him to be there again but it hit me that he won't be, and probably never again.
I went to Roots like two Sundays in a row and I saw him there. But whenever we looked at each other, he looked and walked the other way. That is what troubles me the most, I think. Why I can't let go... The fact that we will never be the same as we used to be. He used to mean so much to me before everything and now he's nothing... He was someone I considered my best friend before it all. And then he was my lover. And now...nothing.
